I Found Everything Just Fine

There is a trend that I have noticed in my grocery store.  The aim of this trend is to make the customer feel like each and every employee is there to help you, to make you feel welcomed, to kiss your ass.  I’ve noticed that the people running the registers have now been trained to say “Hi!  Did you find everything you needed today?”  I don’t want to sound like I don’t appreciate customer service and this new found attention, but am I to believe that the sixteen year-old working this lane on a Friday night actually cares if I found my brand of toothpaste?  Or that the way-past-retirement cash register jockey will be concerned with my inability to find my favorite type of orange.

I don’t think I have ever answered the question with a “no”.  What happens when you respond in that fashion?  Will they drop everything and help you retrieve the long lost over-looked item?  I think next time I’ll just bring my grocery list and go directly to the check-out.  When they ask the question, I’ll say, “Nope, I couldn’t find anything on this list right here.”  I’ll hand over the list and they will have to do my shopping for me.

Although their training is probably a good thing, I think the further training lesson of don’t-be-a-robot needs to be taught as well.  For instance, if I walk up to the register with only one item in my hand and my wallet in the other hand, it’s a fairly safe bet that I came into the store looking for only this one item.  You need not serve up the question.

I place a single bottle of pop on the check-out belt and I have a five dollar bill in the other.

“Did you find everything you needed?”

“Oh no!  It’s a good thing you spoke up!  I was actually here to shop for Thanksgiving dinner!  Good thing you caught me in time.  My family would have been so disappointed with only this bottle of pop to serve.”

Buy my book in aisle seven on the left top shelf half way down.

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21 responses to “I Found Everything Just Fine

  1. It’s even worse in the mall – which I hate going to anyway. It’s like a bunch of Hare Krishnas are at the entrance of Forever 21 greeting me in their Stepford teen voices and stalking me through the racks. If they ask if I found everything, I usually tell them “No, I’m trying to find my 11-year old daughter so we can get the hell out of here.”

  2. 🙂 You should come to France or Germany. The service is…different! Wal Mart crashed in Germany partly because the employees kept asking the customers if they could help them and Germans hate that! Great article!

  3. Haha, you should most definitely do that. I’d love to see the cashier’s reaction when you hand them the list. 😉
    Totally agree by the way.

  4. My cashiers just look at me blankly like, “oh you want this stuff? I’m supposed to ring it up?” And then sigh heavily.
    I’m not sure which is more annoying. Probably over-enthusiasm. It is extra annoying.

  5. This question always makes me laugh too, especially when they point to the basket of sale items by the register and ask if you might have missed a week old candy bar, stamps, or a travel size tube of toothpaste in your dramatic search for everything else on your list. Great post!

  6. I’ve got raging adult ADD so it’s a good thing they’re doing this. It usually reminds me at the last possible second that I’ve forgotten the thing I came to buy in the first place. As I walk back to get those things… I find 30 other things I forgot I didn’t need.

  7. I have several copies of books for that very reason and 40 or so pairs of scissors.

  8. Love this! I often think when they ask me this question – no, I didn’t find it cause it wasn’t there, so what are you prepared to do about it?? But, I figure the poor checker doesn’t get paid enough for me to snark at so I just kindly say “yes.”

  9. Don’t get off script – their heads might explode….now that would be entertainment!

  10. I have said no. It completely throws them off… there have been a couple of items that the store used to carry but doesn’t have anymore. So I say, “No, I couldn’t find it.” They try to avoid it, but they’re supposed to fill out a little form. That’s really not what they want to do.

    Another thing I’ve noticed is that they are so used to asking that they often repeat themselves, “Did you find everything you were looking for?”

    “Yes, thanks.”

    Swiping and bagging commences.

    “Ma’am, did you find everything you were looking for?”

    Me: Disbelief that we had this same exchange roughly 15 seconds ago. “Ye-es…” [looking at cashier, urging him to remember our meaningful words].

    Nothing. No memory. Blank.

Thoughts? Go.

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