The Coffee Quiz!

So here is The Coffee Quiz! Not just any coffee quiz, but “The” coffee quiz with an exclamation point as well. A fellow blogger prodded me to fork over my answers. Ok I guess, but I’m not a coffee drinker. Thanks Maddie. Like I need homework.

– How many cups of coffee per day?
I will not drink it here or there. I will not drink it anywhere.
I might have some copyright issues with this response. So, zero, is my real answer.
– What is your favorite caffeine delivery system?
Currently I have decided remove cola from my world. Since the New Year I have had zero pop. Zero soda for that matter. So my favorite delivery system is/was cola-cola – main lined from a dirty syringe. I would never dream of simply drinking it.
– What was your best cup of coffee?
This is a tough one since I am not a coffee drinker. I would have to say it was a tall glass of coffee with cold milk, hold the coffee. A lot of people call this simply a glass of milk, but I see it as my best cup of coffee.
– What was your worst cup of coffee?
This memory is too painful to talk about. I have petitioned The Coffee Quiz! committee to allow me to skip this section of the quiz. The final ruling is expected any day now. Until then, I will hold this horrible memory in silence.
– What does your favorite mug say?
My favorite mug does not actually have the ability to speak. So, it also remains silent.  I have a couple of greeting cards that actually speak.  If only this was The Greeting Card Quiz!
– How do you take your coffee?
Somehow this question feels like a repeat. I take my coffee with milk. One hundred percent milk. Zero percent coffee.
– When was your first cup?
I think I have tried coffee from time to time. The last attempt was many years ago now. Probably a decade at least. I can’t begin to enjoy coffee due to remembering this guy I worked with a couple of decades ago. His coffee breath was strong enough to melt my desire to enjoy a cup of coffee. What if I was that guy with the coffee breath? I can’t push past that memory.
– Have you ever gone on a coffee date?
Actually, this is where the quiz would actually apply to me. The wife and I go to this little coffee shop on our date nights. We simply hang out there. She is a fake coffee drinker. This means that she’ll order something with a ton of sweet stuff in it and a splash of actual coffee. I guess that makes it an actual coffee order. I always order the hot chocolate.

So there you have it. The Coffee Quiz! has come to completion. It was everything I dreamed it would be.
Can you image dreaming of The Coffee Quiz!? That would be one lame dream.
Buy my book for your coffee table.

21 responses to “The Coffee Quiz!

  1. Sooo not the quiz for a non-java lover!

  2. Hahaha! I love your answers, but I didn’t expect anything less. 😉 A person who has bad breath, and then they add the coffee breath, will definitely take your breath away and singe your eyebrows.

  3. Ahh! Im addicted to coffee, or so i think. Turns out, I went a month without it when I had to do a religious fast and I’m perfectly fine. There goes the one addiction I thought I had.

  4. Your answers cracked me up! “My favorite mug does not actually have the ability to speak.” LOL

  5. I wonder if your mug does not talk due to the inability to speak or if it might perhaps be exercising its Miranda rights. (If this mug could talk, it could tell you about the worst cup of coffee ever.)

    I enjoyed that as well as your creative maneuvering around copyright issues. Well played.

    • I did not think about the fact that the mug might be choosing not to speak. What if its simply mad at me? I wonder what I did wrong. Probably that time that I put it in the dishwasher next to the plates instead of the cups.

  6. huh, a coffee quiz for a non coffee drinker.. interesting. i do like how you take your coffee, with 100% milk. good stuff.

  7. So, once one takes the coffee quiz, how does one know what they’ve scored? Is this one of those tests that need to be turned in? If so, to whom do I submit my answers?

  8. Join me in tea drinking Nirvana! It tastes so much better. And scones and stuff.

Thoughts? Go.

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